Japanese dining has layers of etiquette — some strict, some flexible. Most foreigners are forgiven for not knowing them, but knowing the basics shows respect and makes eating out a richer experience.
Before You Eat
Itadakimasu (いただきます)
Say this before every meal. It means roughly “I humbly receive” — an expression of gratitude for the food, the cook, and everything that went into the meal.
- Used in homes, at restaurants, everywhere
- Say it even if you’re alone
- Accompany with a slight bow or hands pressed together
Oshibori (おしぼり)
A warm (or cold in summer) towel brought before the meal.
- Use it to wipe your hands only — not your face
- Return it to the holder after use
Waiting to Be Seated
- Don’t seat yourself unless a sign says otherwise (セルフ席)
- Wait at the entrance for a staff member to guide you
Chopstick Rules
Chopstick etiquette has several firm rules in Japan.
Never Do These
- ❌ Stick chopsticks upright in rice — this is done at funerals as an offering
- ❌ Pass food chopstick-to-chopstick — also a funeral ritual
- ❌ Point at people with chopsticks
- ❌ Skewer food — chopsticks are not forks
- ❌ Wave or gesture with chopsticks while talking
- ❌ Dig through food looking for the best piece (迷い箸, mayoi-bashi)
- ❌ Rest chopsticks across your bowl — use the chopstick rest (hashioki)
Good Practice
- Rest chopsticks on the hashioki (箸置き) when not using them
- If no hashioki, rest them on the side of a dish
- Don’t lick chopsticks clean
Struggling with Chopsticks?
Asking for a fork (fōku) is completely acceptable at most restaurants. Practice is the only way — even Japanese children take years to master them.
Soup and Noodle Etiquette
Slurping Is Fine
Unlike Western countries, slurping noodles and soup is normal and even complimentary in Japan. It’s seen as expressing enjoyment and also cools the noodles as you eat.
Lifting Bowls
- Lift small bowls (rice bowl, soup bowl) to your mouth — this is polite, not rude
- Don’t hunch over a bowl left on the table — lift it
Drinking Soup
You can drink miso soup directly from the bowl. Use chopsticks or a spoon for the solid ingredients.
At the Restaurant
Calling a Server
Say “すみません” (sumimasen) — don’t wave, snap fingers, or shout.
Many restaurants now have:
- Call buttons on the table — press to summon staff
- Tablet ordering systems — choose and confirm on screen
Ordering
- Take time to decide — staff won’t rush you
- Point at menu photos if you don’t know the Japanese
- “これをください” (kore wo kudasai) = “I’ll have this one” (while pointing)
Water and Tea
- Water or tea is free at almost all Japanese restaurants and is refilled automatically
- Asking for water: “お水をください” (omizu wo kudasai)
During the Meal
Don’t Share Directly From Your Chopsticks
If sharing dishes, use the serving end of shared chopsticks (取り箸, tori-bashi) or ask for a serving spoon.
Making Noise
- Slurping: acceptable for noodles/soup
- Talking with your mouth full: avoid
- Burping: avoid
Finishing Your Rice
In Japanese culture, leaving rice in your bowl is considered wasteful. Finish the rice completely when possible — especially as a guest.
After the Meal
Gochisousama (ごちそうさまでした)
Say this after finishing your meal — “Thank you for the feast.” Use it in restaurants, at home, and whenever someone has cooked for you.
Paying
- In most restaurants, pay at the register on your way out — not at the table
- The check (okaikei / okanjo) is brought to the table or you request it: “お会計をお願いします”
- Splitting is common — “割り勘 (warikan)” — just ask for separate checks or calculate individually
Tipping
Tipping is not practiced in Japan. Do not leave money on the table — it may cause confusion or embarrassment.
Sushi Etiquette
- Eating sushi with your hands is acceptable (traditional, in fact)
- Dip fish-side down into soy sauce — not the rice
- Don’t mix wasabi into soy sauce (in quality restaurants — it’s an insult to the chef)
- Eat each piece in one bite if possible
- Ginger (ガリ) is a palate cleanser — eat between pieces, not with them